


and may you have a very happy new year.

by littlelooneyluna



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Happy New Year!!!, M/M, might make ya cry, this is canon in my eyes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-25 22:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13222830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlelooneyluna/pseuds/littlelooneyluna
Summary: aaron and robert celebrate the new year, as best friends, and reflect on the year which has gone by.





	and may you have a very happy new year.

**Author's Note:**

> happy new year you lovelies xo

 

 

He can hear the music as he approaches the pub, he knows his mum is going all out this year because apparently she's loving her life and he's happy for her, happy that it's with Paddy. He really is.

Aaron's already mentally prepared himself for her and him to be snogging way before midnight as he climbs the steps and tries to push a long piece of silver string from out of his way.

It's all cascading from the pub doors and he feels like an absolute twat walking through it.

He's met with his mum's face as he walks through the doors, she's behind the bar, sipping on a pint with a pink straw and bobbing up and down a little to the beat of some cheesy pop song.

He sees Liv in the corner of the room and for once she's being sensible, she's laughing about something Gerry's said and he's necking back at pint and she's just watching him, not drinking any for herself.

He suddenly feels light as he looks at her, thinks about the fact that she gets to be in his life and he hasn't ruined that yet. It's warming suddenly, and everything prickles through him as she waves her hand up and he waves back.

She's suddenly not a kid anymore.

"What's up with your face?" He hears over the room, over Nicola laughing her head off about something and Charity winking at Vanessa every chance he gets. And it's his mum, she's lounging over the bar and if she leans any further, she's going to start pouring the floor a pint.

"Nothing." He says, and for the first time in a long time, nothing is really wrong. He smiles at her a little and then feels her frowning at him like she doesn't believe a damn word of it. "Honestly, I'm fine." His eyes flicker a little and he shudders. "Mum, I'm happy." He says finally and she's drunk.

She must be because the way she clings onto him for dear life says it all really. She smells of beer and hairspray and he loves her more than he'll ever be able to say.

"After the - the year _you've_ had my darling," she shakes hers head and he's reliving it all suddenly. It wasn't as bad as the year before he thinks, Gordon's there suddenly, and he's nearly dying in that damn lake and then -

For a second, just a second, he closes his eyes and he's giving Robert his ring back and everything dies in his chest.

Everything's black.

And oh,

The year he's hade wasn't meant to be like this.

He wasn't meant to be alone on New Years, Adam behind bars and Vic hidden away at home and _Robert_ -

"I'm just glad you've still got a smile on that face of yours."

Aaron proves her point, smiles. "I had you to get me through it." He says, and suddenly he's vowing to himself that he's not going to be just 'getting through' years anymore. Because he deserves more, he knows that now.

If this mess of a year has taught him _anything_ , it's that he deserves _more_.

The music picks up even louder and she blushes. For a second he wonders how much little comments like those really mean to her and it makes him feel light.

"You got any plans tonight love?" She's asking, and Paddy's there all of a sudden, face all blushed red and a grin drawn.

"Yeah, is Alex whisking you away or -"

And Aaron pulls a face, he sort of wishes he was. He wouldn't mind a bed and sex and Alex cooking him breakfast. He wouldn't mind.

Only,

"Working ain't he? Busiest time of the year apparently." And yeah he doesn't want to stick around and hear his mum and Paddy rabbit on about how that's probably very true.

He turns on his feet a little, decides that he's better of sitting in the corner with a pint and packet of crisps because now Gabby's joined Liv's little gang of hooligans and yeah, he's missing Adam more than he wants to say.

He should be _here_ , the thinks and then Charity of all people is standing in front of him with her arms folded.

"Must be a sad time of year for ya." She says, all jokey as usual and he frowns at her. She's probably got something bad to say about Adam, links it to Moira or whatever and he doesn't want to hear it.

"What are you on -"

"You don't even have the dishy doc for distraction." Charity's got two empty glasses in one hand and she sits down beside him slowly, lets out a soft sigh as she does. It makes Aaron frown suddenly.

"What do you mean, distraction?"

Charity rolls his eyes, "He was in here earlier you know, with Vic." And he's sick of playing whatever game she wants to play. The music is just getting louder and he's not drunk enough yet to be even a little bit merry.

"Who do you think I mean?" She's leaning over and his eyes flicker. " _Sugden_." And she pulls a face. "Times like these ..."

He bites his lip suddenly and shakes his head, he's pulling down at his navy jumper and letting the sleeves drag over his hands.

Times like these.

He keeps thinking about it, over and over again and -

"You think about how it could have been." Charity just _says_ it and he doesn't know why, doesn't know what she's really playing at but he feels his heart drop as he thinks about Robert.

"We're mates. And you're weird." He tells her, offhandedly and awkward.

Only she pulls a face and frowns. "And I'm the Queen of Sheeba." She leans over a little and giggles at herself before she's smiling.

She's drunk.

Everyone's going to get drunk and say things and -

"Charity, you're past it." He says, "And I'm with Alex and -"

"You don't look your happiest." She says, and his eyes flicker and he doesn't know what to say back because suddenly he's thinking about the fact that she doesn't seem him all the time, she isn't biased or -

"I need some fresh air." He says, and he escapes her constant meddling, drags himself up until Gerry's making him down a pint and he's hugging Liv and feeling something light race through him.

He's laughing, feelings his shoulders relax as he steps outside for that fresh air and nearly trips over the steps in his haste.

When he looks up, Robert's sitting on the bench outside.

The pub bench, the bench they sat on after they'd got married.

He's back there, Robert's hugging him close and he can't even fathom ever leaving his arms.

Robert hasn't seen him. It'd be so easy to turn back and get back into the swing of things and try to forget what Charity was going on about and enjoy himself like a normal twenty five year old would.

Only, he doesn't want to.

Only, they're best mates.

"You not cold?" Aaron's asking, it just falls out of his mouth and Robert looks up at him in shock.

"You're the one permanently freezing." He jokes, and Aaron comes closer towards him, wishes he bought his coat with him now the winds picking up.

"What you doing out here?" Aaron's asking, feels his heart do something and suddenly he can't have Robert alone at a time like this. "Come inside, I'll buy you a pint." He says and Robert just nods.

"In a bit." He says, chews at his lip and Aaron almost knows to just sit down and shut up because Robert is almost deep in thought.

He doesn't even think about leaving him.

He should, they're only mates but -

Robert gulps hard and shuffles further along the bench, watches Aaron slide towards him.

"Been doing a lot of thinking recently." Robert whispers, makes himself smaller and shakes his head. "Maybe a bit too much."

"That was always dangerous." Aaron says steadily, hits Robert's knee quickly, encouraging him to carry on.

Robert just smiles faintly. "This year, it's been - well, the best _and_ worst year of my life." He says shakily and Aaron knows that not everyone can understand that.

Only suddenly _he_ can.

"I mean, I married you." Robert raises his head a little and he's got tears in his eyes. "How crazy is that?"

Aaron scoffs, and his smile actually manages to meet his eyes because yeah, they actually did.

"Mad innit? Us two, daring to be domestic." Aaron says, gulps hard and his smile fades as Robert nods.

"Loved ya, then lost ya, and lost ya and -" Robert stops abruptly, and Aaron keeps it together.

"You've got me." He blurts out and Robert just stares at him. "Or did you forget being the best friend I'll ever have?" He can't help but be cheeky, add something light to how heavy it is.

How heavy _this_ is because -

Last year, they escaped at midnight and watched the fireworks together on the Main Street and kissed and kissed and it was everything Aaron ever thought he'd need.

And now -

Robert pulls his knee a little further away from Aaron and sniffs. "Oh yeah, how could I forget that." He says.

Only Aaron can feel his pain.

He wants it gone.

"One pint, and then you can do one." Aaron says and Robert slides off the bench, nods at Aaron until he's following him inside and -

One drink turns into three, then four and Liv has a night off hating Robert and Aaron shouldn't be as grateful as he is.

Only, Gerry's on the karaoke and Liv is snap chatting with Gabby and somehow Aaron ends up in a booth with Robert just like last year.

Robert's more relaxed, he can see it and it makes him smile.

"You want anything stronger?" Aaron asks, over the music. Only Robert just shakes his head.

"I'm off the hard stuff." He tells Aaron. "Doesn't serve me any favours."

And yeah,

I cheat on people.

I get knocked down by cars.

Aaron nods, understands.

He slumps himself back down and sighs. He's looser too, on his fourth pint now and Robert is so close.

"I never thanked ya." Aaron says, only Robert can't hear and he says it even closer to his ear.

"For what?" Robert's shy, held back and soft and it suits him.

Makes him even more of an attractive sod and Aaron wants to punch himself.

"If it wasn't for you - helping with the appeal - I would have still been inside by now." Aaron's got tears in his eyes and apparently beer and Robert make him emotional on New Years.

Robert's face drops, like he's enabling the weight of it all to soak into him.

And he shuffles a little, feet tapping against the floor.

"You don't have to thank me." He says, eyes falling over Aaron's face. "It's what we do, save each other."

And there's so much sentiment there that Aaron feels faint.

He's telling Robert to fight for his son,

He's begging Robert to wake up, because he doesn't want him to leave him.

Instead, he raises his pint, and Robert raises his and they're back in that hospital again and Aaron's got tears in his eyes and they're cheersing to something neither of them can name just yet.

Now though, it's this friendship.

This undeniable link between them which they know isn't able to budge.

It's just two heartbeats and all this love that they have no clue what to do with just yet.

They stay like that, until Liv's wanting Aaron to take a picture of her and Gabby and Robert's disappearing.

And then the countdown starts, and Liv's here, so is his mum and Paddy and the whole Dingle lot.

But his feet draw him outside as it reaches twelve and -

Robert's there, hands in his pockets and smile on his face and,

"Happy New Year mate." He gets out, almost choked a little as he speaks and Aaron drags him into a hug as they stand there.

Eventually,

Aaron's letting go, smiling up at Robert and then he's feeling Robert press his lips against his cheek and he shudders.

"Sorry." Robert says gently, pulls away and Aaron just shakes his head at him.

Drops the word mate in the next sentence he says and the air is light again, and his legs don't feel like jelly that much anymore.

"Happy New Year." Aaron says softly, a wind dancing around him and his eyes practically glimmering.

Fireworks suddenly pull them away from each other and a crowd of people start to pour out of the pub.

They're not alone anymore.

It's probably for the best, Aaron thinks, as his mum grabs hold of him and hugs him close.

As Robert waves a hand and slopes back to Vic's.

It's for the best, as Alex texts him:

_Happy New Year Xx_

And Aaron hears another firework go off.

Fresh New Year,

Fresh New Start,

Same heart though.

 

 

 


End file.
